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About Artisan Crafts / Hobbyist Premium Member BethanyFemale/United States Groups :iconbroken-hearted-poets: Broken-Hearted-Poets
The wounds are deep...
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What's the best way to deal with sadness/depression? 

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Journal Entry: Tue Apr 21, 2015, 4:51 PM


You know that sadness that starts to nibble at you just before the start of an ending? The nudge of pain preceding the inevitable? That seems to be where I sit now, getting ready to entertain the pain of being alone for the summer, knowing though that I still have a little bit of time before I am actually alone. See, it wouldn't be so bad but that I've made some amazing friends here at school, and despite stress and drama, I still hold them close to my heart. Yes I've abandoned some people along the way, I admit that, but I don't feel the need to keep people who are poisonous in my life. Some people have walked out of my life for reasons they have not explained, and some have popped up and out too many times to know. I've found something akin to love here too, but that's really too strong a word to use for someone who right now isn't able to care for me as I do for him. That's okay, but I will miss being with him more than most people I think. I don't look forward to the sadness but I am prepared. I hope.

In other news, I am trying hard to get through my final essays and actual finals. I'll be at school right till the end of finals, hopefully hanging out with my friends before getting some work done, as well as after. I know I know, get work done and get crafts done, but I have to keep up my social life. I guess for you guys I just want to keep you in the loop. I know I don't post much here anymore but that's because I have no time for being alone to craft -- I would rather be with my friends. Anyway, I have to go and be even more social, but I do want you to know I am still crafting mentally and have new ideas. I might be posting more poetry here since that takes less time than making and baking things. 

  • Mood: Hungry
  • Listening to: Jazz in New Moon Cafe

deviantID

BethyLuv215
Bethany
Artist | Hobbyist | Artisan Crafts
United States
So if youre reading this, I guess you wanna know about me. well, Here's a little list that should help ya:

I love drawing
Love singing
Love movies
ADORE cuddling and snuggling if theres someone willing
Think the outside world is simply stunning
I may be short, but I AM NOT YOUR ARMREST!!!!!!
I suffered from on and off anorexia, bulimia, cutting, and have severe depression when alone for a long time, but I'm just about cured now I'd say.
Animals are one of my many passions!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH!!!!!!!!
If ever anyone needs a friend, i'm your girl. I'm here no matter what when I'm needed, and as loyal as a puppy. (But no worries, I wont shed on your couch =P )

So basically, I'm a teenager who has a plan in life but knows maybe that plan isn't quite set in stone. I struggle with keeping on the bright side of life sometimes, but every day I am proud to say I'm still alive. :)

Current Residence: Pluto (ITS STILL A PLANET TO ME!!!!!!!!!!)
Favourite genre of music: alternative or soft rock
Favourite style of art: poetry, sculpture
MP3 player of choice: ipod
Shell of choice: conch
Wallpaper of choice: anything that expresses me
Favourite cartoon character: Popeye? Danny Phantom? Snap (from ChalkZone)?
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Love my Friends

Journal Entry: Tue Apr 21, 2015, 4:51 PM


You know that sadness that starts to nibble at you just before the start of an ending? The nudge of pain preceding the inevitable? That seems to be where I sit now, getting ready to entertain the pain of being alone for the summer, knowing though that I still have a little bit of time before I am actually alone. See, it wouldn't be so bad but that I've made some amazing friends here at school, and despite stress and drama, I still hold them close to my heart. Yes I've abandoned some people along the way, I admit that, but I don't feel the need to keep people who are poisonous in my life. Some people have walked out of my life for reasons they have not explained, and some have popped up and out too many times to know. I've found something akin to love here too, but that's really too strong a word to use for someone who right now isn't able to care for me as I do for him. That's okay, but I will miss being with him more than most people I think. I don't look forward to the sadness but I am prepared. I hope.

In other news, I am trying hard to get through my final essays and actual finals. I'll be at school right till the end of finals, hopefully hanging out with my friends before getting some work done, as well as after. I know I know, get work done and get crafts done, but I have to keep up my social life. I guess for you guys I just want to keep you in the loop. I know I don't post much here anymore but that's because I have no time for being alone to craft -- I would rather be with my friends. Anyway, I have to go and be even more social, but I do want you to know I am still crafting mentally and have new ideas. I might be posting more poetry here since that takes less time than making and baking things. 

  • Mood: Hungry
  • Listening to: Jazz in New Moon Cafe
Someday I’ll write you a letter
You won’t know it’s addressed to you
You won’t notice the desperation
Won’t see there are tear stains
You won’t think twice because it’s not signed

Someday I’ll write you a song
You won’t even know it’s for you
You won’t notice the lyrics
Won’t hear all my rhymes
Beating in time with my heart

Someday I’ll paint you a picture
There’ll be colors swirling so bright
It might make you smile
It might warm your heart
But you won’t know it’s you who inspired it

Someday I’ll write you a poem
You won’t even notice I’ll bet
You’ll pass by or read it
And might say, “oh how cute”
And you won’t even question, “for who?”



Someday I’ll write you a poem
And someday has come close at hand
And I’ll hope that you see it
And hope that you won’t
Because I don’t know if you’ll understand
(And I'm not sure whether or not I want you to)
Oblivious
I'm not going to explain who this is for or what's going on in my life -- it's complicated -- but here's to all the people who have to watch the person they care about act totally oblivious to affection. Or worse, who know you cars, and for any number of reasons isn't reciprocating how you wish they would. 
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:iconjazzberrytigercandy:
JazzBerryTigerCandy Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I very much enjoy your little critters.
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:iconbethyluv215:
BethyLuv215 Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2015  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
I gave you a llama to say thanks for all of the favorites! :)
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:iconjazzberrytigercandy:
JazzBerryTigerCandy Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Aww you shouldn't have
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:iconbethyluv215:
BethyLuv215 Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2015  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Aww thank you very much! :3
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:iconjazzberrytigercandy:
JazzBerryTigerCandy Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
^^
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:iconkeroro93:
Keroro93 Featured By Owner Mar 12, 2015
Thanks for the :+fav: ! :D
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:iconhanbo-hobbit:
HanBO-Hobbit Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2015  Student Traditional Artist
Thanks for the favourite on "TARDIS Butterfly in the Time Vortex"!
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:icondevilsangel8688:
DevilsAngel8688 Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2015
:iconearlybirthdayplz: Have your cake and eat it too 
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:iconbethyluv215:
BethyLuv215 Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2015  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Aww thank you!!!! I actually really needed this right now, knowing someone notices me. xD Thanks so so much!!!! :hug:
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