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Pity's PartyCome on, just look at me,
I lost Happy to Misery,
In a dance with Pedigree,
Amidst the sirens of Apathy,
In the mosh pit in my head.

Can't you see how fun I am?
When my Pride's on the lam,
Sipping Sorrow like Baby Cham,
Falling foul of Honesty's scam,
On the dance floor in my chest.

I look so grievously good,
Doing what Agony should,
And what Depravity would,
In command of the red regiments stood,
On the catwalk of my wrist.

I can hear them pounding,
Watching and surrounding,
Laughing and floundering,
With Pain and Woe hounding,
In the nightclub of my gut.

My guests are saying to,
Cheer no longer pulling through,
Despair
MOVED DEVIATIONThis Deviation has been moved to my new account: :iconzombiefallenangel:
Deviation location: http://zombiefallenangel.deviantart.com/art/Eyes-308317363
Day for a DepressiveDragging along is a simple thing
                                                                here there is no pleasure;
                                  
I fail at everythingI failed at being a friend
I failed at being a daughter
I failed at being a good student
I failed at being a sister
I failed at being a happy teen

I just fail at everything but a few things

I don't fail at being a mess up
I don't fail at being depressed
I don't fail at hurting my self
I don't fail at hurting my family
I don't fail at bad stuff....
Nonet Two I ThoughtI Thought…

I thought you would not ever hurt me.

I guess I was completely wrong.

You promised to protect me,

The end was prolonged.

You said you loved me.

I can't be strong.

Please help me.

Sing my

Song.

Kela lewis-morin
Ready.Ready to kill,
Ready to fight,
Ready to learn,
Ready to forget,
Ready to hate,
Ready to love,
Ready to know,
Ready to not,
Ready to stand strong,
Ready to cry,
Ready to believe,
Ready to lie,
Ready to fake happiness,
Ready to feel the sadness,
Ready to accept,
Ready to deny,
Ready to live,
Ready to die.

Some things never change.
Prayer of the broken heartedLove like water slips
Oh impossible to hold
Through these reaching fingers
Trickles burnished gold

Love, like a butterfly
Oh impossible to hold
To seize thy beauteous wings
Risks dangers best untold

Love a fleeting shadow
Oh impossible to hold
Crushed and broken heart
Why must thou be so bold

Love, like a moonbeam
Oh impossible to hold
Thou art full of beauty
yet always leave me cold

Love will thou not be sunlight
And grace my life with day
bring the healing touch of warmth
And for a season stay?
Together in This SinWake up in the morning
Just to hear you scream
Remembering your Nightmares
Where things aren't as they seem
Try to calm you down
Try to help you rest
You keep pushing me away
You say it's for the best
Try to hold you close
And tell you it's alright
You refuse to listen
You always try to fight
Let me be your protector
Let me be your fire
Let me dispel your fears
And feed all your desires
Why can't I be your hero?
Why can't I be your Sun?
I'll save you from the Dark
You'll never have to run
So quit pushing me away
I don't want to go
You're tearing up my heart
My scars are starting to show
Am I not strong enough
To stand
CutCut

When I cut myself, the angels watch.
I remind them of you, Mary
As a huddled girl, the stone behind your body,
A blank slate, waiting for words, the sharp prick of a dove's beak.
I cut lightly into my belly,
No scar, it seeps into me, becomes me.
My hands move slowly
As though they are being led by the letters, no closed circles,
Just lines and loops that lead out of themselves.
I do not want scars, just lines slender as snakes.
One of the angels wants to write her name,
Etched river reeds, a shattering of glass.
When I taste my blood, I taste of plums.
Mary, handmaiden, entrance to heaven,
I do not want heaven. I want sna
I've been waiting...Sacred moments pass
Life's sad echoes play
Come then dreaded chapter
This time I shall stay

Truth that I have run from
Come and have your day
For tolerant understanding
Is there any use to pray?

Momma don't disown me
I didn't plan to be this way
I think that I can face the world
If some loving words you'll say

I've spent forever waiting
But the moments never right
So sit down here and listen
I can't bear with you to fight...
MOVED DEVIATIONhttp://zombiefallenangel.deviantart.com/art/Remember-308320435
If My Heart Held All My FeelingsIf my heart held all my feelings
I'd tear that thing right out
And smash it on the floor
And stomp it
And crush it
And beat it
And break it
More than it was broken before
Because that damn heart
It doesn't work right
It keeps in all the dark stuff
And it lets go of the light
But without that stupid
Fickle little organ
I'd live free forever
Feelingless, floating
In a sea of relief because
The pain will be gone
And the guilt will be gone
And the fear will be gone
And I wouldn't have a stupid
Fickle little organ
Pumping poison in my bloodstream
Putting poison in my thoughts
I'd be free
Be free forever
Heartless, yes, bu
Insert Name HereWe are what they tell us;
No matter how strong,
No matter how wrong.
We are moulded by our distrust,
And when needs must,
We just want to be what they can see,
And so let them tell us what we must be,
Even when it hurts.

Tell me who I am;
Who you want me to be,
I'll change if you don't want me.
I just want to be labelled and to belong,
To be known in what life must prolong.
I just want to be what they can see,
And so let them tell me what I must be,
Especially when it hurts.

Tell me who they are;
The suicide kids of now,
Forever wondering how,
They ever got to be who they aren't,
As if they've been told they can't,
Be the
Awake or Asleep?Awake or Asleep

My imagination runs wild
Making up stories
In my mind

Is it true?
Did they die?
Is it true?
Am I alive?

What's going on?
What's real?

What is life?
And will the scars every fully heal?

I'm lost
I'm confused
WHo are you?

Is this from staying up all night?
Or from believing the lies?

What's going on?
Oh what is real?
Why won't these scars hurry up and heal?!

Pitch black
Darkness surounds me.

Staring me in the face
Are my past mistakes
I can't escape

Am I awake?
Or am I asleep?

Crack clocks
Bleeding wallsWhite room
With me standing alone at different ages

Dreaming?
Or Hallucinating?

What's happenin
messed up teensThere's no future for me
as I lay here
my head is in pain why
can't you see?

you say it'll be ok
but what if it's not?

tomorrow may be the end
but who knows for certain?

I'm scared yes but my
bravery died out the
moment happiness left

my childhood shattered like
the tiles on the ground I
can't breath I'm trapped...I'm
going to die in a fucked up house

you all say I'm a teenager now
it's all expected from me
it's not ok...I'm in pain
my head and my heart
is the same but
with a thick layer of ice

to cling onto love I'm deemed as
odd as some lonely kid
forgotten and lost
but I'm not so stop calling me
gay...
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More from *BethyLuv215

You Are GoneYou smile but it's only a picture.
You laugh but it's only in my memory.
You kiss me but it's only a forgotten possibility.
You hold me in waking and sleep, but it's only a dream left behind.

Do you remember the day we met?
Do you remember the jokes we used to make?
Do you remember when I cried and you kissed me?
Do you remember when I fell asleep in your arms?

Sometimes I look at your picture and I cry.
Sometimes I relive our dates in my head.
Sometimes I think of all the possibilities we had together.
Sometimes I dream that you're still here with me.

But you don't smile at me anymore.
But you and I don't talk, let alone laugh.
What's Left of MeTear my heart out, rip apart my soul.
                                                                   That's what I've done to myself.

Break me to pieces because I'm so weak.
                                 &
Emotional WhirlwindI'm Sweating.
                                                             I'm freezing!
I can't cry.
                                                             The tears won't stop.
My limbs are numb.
                                                             Every atom hurts inside me.
I am stiff as stone.
                                                             I can hardly hold myself up.
Everything seems still and slowed.
                                                             All of me shakes like naked trees.
I feel so dead.
                                                             This bleeding proves
Notice MeLook up from your desk.
Look up from your book.
Look up from your laptop
                       or cellphone
                       or iPod and songs.

Why can't you see me?
Why don't you care?
Why won't you answer my letters?
                       wishes?
                       calls?

Do you even know my name?
Do you even recognize my face?
Do you even think of my eyes?
                       my nose?
                       my smile?

How long must I wait for you to see me?
How long till you know the love in my heart?
How long till I can call you my own?
                       my love?
                       my d
A Lover's PleaHow can I explain the things I've done?
How can I let myself do what I do?

I can't stop thinking about you, though I don't know why.
I can't stop checking if you're safe.

Why can't I just let you go?
Why must my heart still beat your name?

I see your face and my eyes water.
I look at the pictures of us and my breath catches.

Why can't I live by that saying by Dr. Seuss?
                         "Don't cry because it's over; smile because it happened."
Why must my heart break from the happiness that you brought
What Have I Done?Each day I must resist  
The urge to tear myself
Apart. Each day I have
Tried so hard not to harm
Myself, out of love for you.
Part of me knows that
                                                         what
I'm doing is for the best,
Yet part of me thinks self-
Harm is the best thing to do.
How is it that I began to heal
When you loved

Featured in Groups:

:iconemo-club: #Emo-Club
+ Emo Love + :iconmonochromephilosophy: #MonochromePhilosophy
...that leads to darkness :iconemotions-in-art: #Emotions-in-art
LoveHateSorrowHappiness..... :iconemo-poet-society: #Emo-Poet-Society
 :iconmental-illnesses: #Mental-Illnesses
Let's talk :icondramaticpoetry: #DramaticPoetry
poetry sharing :iconcreative-writers: #Creative-Writers
 :iconsad-writers: #Sad-Writers

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March 1, 2012
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[x]

Love Freefall

:iconbethyluv215:

In my heart I know there is the terrible feeling that I'm
                                                                                       s
                                                                                          i
                                                                                             n
                                                                                                k
                                                                                                   i
                                                                                                     n
                                                                                                        g...

In my head, I feel my thoughts    z
                                                   i
                                                           g
                                                       z
                                                   a
                                               g
                                                   i
                                                       n
                                                           g
                                                                                  over you

Every night, my breaths seem to come so
                                                  short
                                                           and then so very
   l                                      o                                           n                                                   g


I cant seem to keep my mind   s
                                          t
                                          r
                                          a
                                          i
                                          g
                                          h
                                          t

My heart is still
                                        b
                                                                  r
                                                                                        o
      k
                                                 e
                                                                                                n

But somehow, in the midst of it all,
I find myself on the edge of a cliff.
One that might as well be love,
Or something close perhaps.
And strange as it feels
I think I just
might take
that








j
               

   






        u
      

        







             m
    










                      p    
    
:iconbethyluv215:
just expressing my fellings. my head is so utterly confused right now. how can my heart be broken soo badly, and yet also be trying to start new? This new guy... He knows i'm depressed, but he still cares. The old guy left, in short, because my depression got too much for him. I dont want to let him go, but I know i have to, and the opportunity just walked up to me giftwrapped. And I dont know what to do, or how I feel about any of it....
love 1 1 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconalittlebitoffaith:
~alittlebitoffaith Mar 5, 2012
I love how this is laid out .. I can feel all the emotions and I can picture all this in my head ... But my advice to uis let go of the jerk that left because he cldnt handle ur depression the guy u like right now the one u are writing this for he has healed or is healing ur heart enjoy it :)
Reply
:iconmaloriblackmon:
~maloriblackmon Mar 4, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
i love how this is laid out! very neat! and sorry about how u feel i felt the same way a couple of times
Reply
:iconstarletletters:
Mood: Caring ~starletletters Mar 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
tip: flip a coin. it seems like in the last second before the coin lands, you already know which side it will land on. so pick a side. one side could be staying in love with the lost one/not going for it with this gift left on your doorstep, or...going for it. ur pick.
p.s. this was just my opinion. i felt like i needed to say something since noone else has commented..
Reply
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